The Power of Frequency: Why Quarterly Assessments of Your Circle are Essential

It's undisputed that we are the sum total of our experiences and the people we allow into our lives. Our personal and professional growth is interwoven with those we choose to surround ourselves with - our inner circle. This includes the closest of friends, mentors, colleagues, and family members. They're the ones who share our aspirations, console our disappointments, and are our constant companions in our journey through life. It is crucial to assess this intimate group periodically because these people powerfully shape who we are and who we become.  As the adage goes, 'show me your friends, and I'll show you your future.' It's a potent reminder of how those we surround ourselves with significantly impact our development.

Traditionally, the assessment of my circle has been an annual endeavor.  Once per year, I take a few days and make sure that not only are those in my circle the "right" circle, but also, and probably most importantly, am I "right for them".  Sometimes my circle will shrink, sometimes it will expand, but I've always stuck to doing this on an annual basis.  Recently, I was challenged by someone in my inner circle, a trusted confidant whose opinion I value, to reassess my assessment frequency. This advice, initially perplexing, but upon reflection, I realized the immense value this could offer. Here's why.

From Annual to Quarterly: Embracing Change

The suggestion to shift from an annual to a quarterly assessment of my circle initially took me by surprise. But as I mulled over the idea, the logic behind it became increasingly evident. People change, circumstances shift, and waiting a year to reevaluate the connections that impact our lives the most can put us in a disadvantageous position.

Just as businesses run quarterly reports to assess their performance and make necessary adjustments, a similar approach in our personal lives ensures we maintain an environment conducive to our growth. 

Adopting a quarterly evaluation aligns more harmoniously with life's rhythm, mirroring the cyclical nature of the four seasons. As our needs, goals, and relationships subtly transform with the ebb and flow of life, these regular reflections offer us a timely opportunity to realign our circle with our evolving selves.

The Pillars of the Circle

When conducting these evaluations, it's crucial to define clear criteria to assess those within our circle. In my own experience, I have found three key essential values: selflessness, the ability to challenge and encourage growth, and the demonstration of 'fight' or grit.

Selflessness: Fostering Mutual Support

Selflessness is a reflection of empathy, understanding, and a genuine concern for others. It is about the willingness to support without the expectation of reciprocation. However, it's not about self-sacrifice. It's a balance that ensures we're able to care for ourselves while also supporting others. Individuals in our circle should inspire and promote this balance. Such individuals not only enrich your life but also inspire you to extend the same generosity and empathy to others.

The Pillars of Progress: Challenge and Growth

Our circle should be composed of people who aren't afraid to challenge us, people who motivate us to constantly strive for improvement. Their disagreement isn't a sign of discord; it's a testament to their commitment to our growth. They offer alternative perspectives, stimulate thought, and promote a growth mindset.

Through their provoking conversations and challenging ideas, these individuals hold us accountable for our goals and keep us grounded in reality, fostering our personal and professional development. By holding you accountable for your aspirations, they become a crucial part of your personal development journey.

Fight and Grit: The Spirit of Resilience

Resilience, determination, and the capacity to endure adversity – that's what I identify as 'fight' or 'grit'. These are the traits I value in the individuals in my circle. Such individuals serve as a beacon of strength in challenging times, demonstrating through their actions that persistence is a key ingredient to success.

The 'fight' is about the courage to pursue dreams, the tenacity to stay on course, and the resolve to learn from failures. Having such gritty individuals in your circle instills a similar resilience in your own approach to life's hurdles.

Associates, Friends, and the Inner Circle

While assessing your circle, it's crucial to distinguish it from your broader network of relationships. Not everyone we interact with belongs in our inner circle, which is perfectly acceptable.

Our circle should comprise those individuals who have a profound impact on our personal and professional development. This does not imply that those outside our circle are any less valuable or cherished. They might still be good friends or associates, but they play a different role in our lives.

Not being in your circle doesn't degrade the value of a relationship. It simply denotes a different level of connection and influence. It's not about creating an exclusive club but identifying the individuals who significantly and constructively impact your life journey.

The Quarterly Revolution

This shift in perspective, from an annual to a quarterly evaluation of our circle, promises a significant impact on our personal and professional growth. It ensures that our circle remains dynamic, reflecting our changing needs, and remains responsive to our evolving life circumstances.

However, it's essential to remember that assessing our circle is not only about evaluating others but also about reflecting on our own growth. After all, the essence of a circle is reciprocity.

By adopting a quarterly rhythm to assess our circle, we ensure that we nurture the bonds that form our unique support system. It's about embracing the changes, nurturing the connections, and most importantly, growing together.

So, here's a challenge to you, just as someone in my circle challenged me: reassess the frequency of evaluating your circle. You might be surprised by the profound insights and accelerated growth that this change can bring about. Because at the end of the day, it's your circle, your sanctuary of growth. Treat it with the care it deserves, and it will treat you to a fulfilling, enriching journey of life.